LOST

by Ellen


So, it's no lie that I love LOST. And yes, if you're really into LOST, you always, ALWAYS write it this way: LOST. All caps, all the time. And I'm REALLY excited because it hasn't been on since MAY and I find myself thinking about it from time to time. It's so well-written, unpredictable, and DEEP. So many layers--and so many blogs. It's ridiculous how many people have devoted much of their time to blogging about the physical, the metaphysical, the mysterious, the scientific, the magical, the real-life wonders of LOST. I must admit, that when I first started watching, I read some of these things. Most of it was gobbelty-goop, but it was fascinating nonetheless. I can't even make fun of those people because if I had that much time, I'd watch LOST all day. I LOVE LOST.

Here's a game I like to play: Find the people in your life who would be a character on LOST. Like, Elise would totally be Kate. My friend John would totally be Jack Shepard. My friend Sam is definitely Sawyer, but less angry and tortured. Claire is Claire because she's preggers, and they have the same name. Not sure who Locke would be. See what I mean? It's fun! Sometimes it changes.

And this is hilarious. If you watch it, you will laugh your pants off.

LOST: How To Make a Sandwich on the Island …. copied from HERE

Jack
1. Gather ingredients
2. Point gun at ingredients and shout “HOW DO I MAKE A SANDWICH OUT OF YOU?!?!?”
3. Breathe heavily through your nose as though you were about to hit ingredients
4. Give up and make the sandwich yourself, and eat it bitterly

Kate
1. Make separate sandwiches, one with peanut butter and one with jelly
2. Take a bite of the peanut butter sandwich, declaring it the best
3. Take a bite of the jelly sandwich, declaring it the best
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 ad infinitum
5. Follow peanut butter or jelly sandwich into grave danger

Sawyer
1. Throw the jar of jelly at wall, sneering “I don’t need no sandwich”
2. Call the mascot on the jar of peanut butter lots of clever nicknames
3. Huff and puff and stomp around and grumble a lot
4. When no one’s looking, make perfect, even, symmetrical peanut butter and jelly sandwich and sit in a corner, enjoying every bite

Locke
1. Sit idly by, believing that the ingredients will find a way to make a sandwich out of themselves
2. Lose faith and make the sandwich anyway
3. Realize that you were the instrument by which the ingredients chose to make a sandwich after all
4. Run around the room and grab everyone’s knives, insisting that their sandwiches will do the same in time

Hurley
1. Make sandwich
2. Eat sandwich
3. Repeat steps 1 and 2 ad infinitum

Sayid
1. Procure 23 milligrams of uranium-20
2. Set hadron supercollider to eight megajoules
3. Program a sandwich-making macro using Cobol or Visual Basic
4. Act all tough-like

Desmond
1. Eat sandwich
2. Call the sandwich “brother”
3. Place peanut butter slice over jelly slice
4. Spread jelly on the other slice
5. Spread peanut butter on one slice
6. Take two slices of bread, a jar of peanut butter and a jar of jelly

Ben
1. Steal someone else’s sandwich
2. Claim you coerced them into making the sandwich for you all along
3. Say you’ll tell them everything if they make you another sandwich
4. Stare at them all creepy-like

Libby
1. Lay out plans for one of the most intricate, fascinating, and delicious sandwiches of all time
2. Just as you start making it, get shot

Danielle
1. Apply peanut butter
2. Disappear for eight months
3. Apply jelly
4. Disappear for eight months
5. Eat sandwich

Claire
1. Mmmmmmm, peanut butter

Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse
1. Make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich
2. Have someone take a bite, then tell them it’s a baloney sandwich
3. Make up a whole bunch of other crap, then say you had planned it all along
4. Buy a few yachts

LOST is starting this week!!!!